Day One: Some Trees Had Noses, Others Had Roses

Yesterday was day one. It looked like day zero, mostly due to the fact that most of my time is spent with my little Cuddlebug.  In fact, it came to my attention yesterday that even with this goal, not much has changed really. I thought it would be super hard. It actually wasn't terrible.

Bug-a-boo was on one yesterday though. He was a grumpster! And a sleepyhead. It was a beautiful and sunshiny day and he wanted to spend it in bed! Well, luckily we had the opportunity to go outside for a walk.


As we passed by trees with faces, I thought about being a mom. Remember, part of my goal is to do something personally fulfilling. But really, that sounds pretty selfish. I'm supposed to be a mom, and here I am looking for self-fulfillment. As I took that walk with little Bug, I came to the conclusion that being a mom is very fulfilling to me (difficult, amazing, tear-jerking, and humbling too).

I thought, it makes sense. I mean, if my goal in life is to become more like Jesus Christ--that is, develop attributes like the ones He has: patience, charity, faith, etc--then I know of no better way to do that than to become a mommy. Being a mom means giving service to others. Being a mom has strengthened my faith (had to, for me it just was too hard to not learn to rely on the Lord more). You develop a truckload of patience, or you die.

 So really, being a mom is personally fulfilling.

That means, even if I don't do anything with my day other than take care of little Bug and being a mom, I've completed my goal for the month. Right?

Okay yes, I was tempted left and right yesterday to just pop onto the computer for a little jaunt and watch a little Doc Martin. But I didn't! Go me. What made it easier was when Bug woke up from his afternoon nap all happy for the first time that day, looking up at me with his gorgeous  eyes saying...

"Mommy, can we go for a walk? PUWEEZE?!?!"

Yeah, I about died from the cuteness of it all. Oh right, something else I just remembered about yesterday. I didn't have a ton of energy. What a terrible way to start my goal month right? The thought of going for a walk made me want to dive under my bed in fear like Kevin from Home Alone. In fact, all exercise makes me feel that way.

But how can you resist that FACE?

It was pretty ideal outside for a walk; gorgeous sunshine, warm, slight breeze. Happy babbling baby. I swear, he perked up just for the walk (because when we got home he was back to being grumpy). Guess that's a clue, right?

Time to sum up: yesterday my activity to replace TV and make my life more well-lived was a walk. On my walk, I realized that it's really being a mommy.

And seeing some beautiful flowers in January.

But mostly, being a mom.

And Then She Turned Off The TV

Yes. It has finally happened. I realized that I live life a bit like that girl in that one book... (oh mommy brain, please remember...what was it? Right The Library Card by Jerry Spinelli) where she reads a book that recites her life verbatim. At one point it says something to the effect of "Then she turned on the TV."

That was the end of her book.

Can I just say that I think about that scenario and I cringe? That's me! Granted, I did just have my very first baby a few months ago. I felt justified in convalescing postpartum  in front of a show on Neftlix. And really, I was. I mean, who has energy for anything other than taking care of brand new Cuddlebug? Certainly not me. So after my Bug goes down for a nap, Agents of SHIELD it is. Nursing for an hour at a time several times at night? No problem. I found The Blacklist to be quite exciting. Thank heavens for computers, by the way. Middle of the night TV programming is terrible, TV programmers. You guys really ought to do something about that.

Except now...

Bug is sleeping better through the night. I have realized that I am coming out of the haze of extreme sleep deprivation and depleted energy stores. I can't tell you how good that feels! And now that I have the energy to step out the front door, and do stuff, I don't WANT to. It's bad, Chucky. I'm an addict. I am a Doctor Who Aholic that rocks Cuddlebug to sleep and then bounds back into her bed either for a nap, or to watch another episode and eat chocolate. 

The first step is to admit you have a problem.

My name is Kristi and I've come to realize that my computer has a greater gravitational pull than the earth.

So, I have turned off the current show Doc Martin. And Minecraft. And anything else that wasted my time.

The goal?
One Month. Tomorrow to February 28th. No TV shows, video games, or things of that nature. Books are okay (a decision after my hubby told me that I did need to have something I could do to "unstring the bow," as it were.)

Instead, I am going to do something every day that is a personally fulfilling pursuit. Something I have never done before preferably, but not a requirement. Some of my plans include blogging this goal (super scary, because I have never even TRIED blogging anything before), successfully completing twelve exercises in one month at Curves for the first time, finding more students for my music studio, furthering some of my writing projects, and more things as I find them.

Ultimately, I want to get more out of life: I want to enjoy my baby more. I want to look back on the things that I did during the day and sigh with deep pleasure as I soak in a bubble bath.


I have only one question to ask:

Anyone want to join me?